This Sunday, as my family pulled into the church parking lot, my wife asked me the question "do you have to do anything at church today?" My response was "I'll find out when I walk in the door."
I had no official responsibilities that day. Yet, after being there for less than five minutes, I heard someone calling my name. The sound booth computer was acting up. I put on my superman cape and jumped into action! Ok, maybe without a cape…
Last week, I wrote about sound booth spam and how we, as sound tech's, are the target for all sorts of comments and questions. Another target that is painted on us is that of "super-geek."
Super Geeks are assumed to;
1. Have keys for every door in the building – or get copies of keys when needed.
2. Know where every tv, video player, and spare extension cord is located.
3. Have the ability to fix all computers.
4. Be in communication with everyone (yet another reason to reference the Borg.)
5. Know how to fix a scratched DVD that's supposed to be playing RIGHT NOW.
It's written in stone somewhere that after announcing that you (or your wife) is pregnant, you must be bequeathed gifted with the book "What to Expect When You're Expecting." I'd like to write my own book for rookie sound tech's called "What to Expect When You Are Expected." The minute any sound tech walks in the door, they have to expect that someone will desire their expertise, even if they have that weekend off.
I'd break down the book into these chapters;
1. The Stuff Everyone Assumes You Know
2. How to Google with Maximum Results Using Your iPod While Carrying a Fresh Cup of Coffee
3. Lord of the Keyrings
4. Chariots of Fire: Running From the Stage to the Booth Without Getting Caught.
5. Master of Disguise: How to Attend Church Without Getting Roped into Anything.
What Chapters Would You Write?
I'm Chris Huff and I've been working behind a mixer for over twenty years. Since 2008, I've been helping other sound techs learn all about the art of church audio through behindthemixer.com.
For more about me, 
Your post is so true. I find that when I am ‘off-duty’ for a given Sunday I will usually be asked to run powerpoint for my Sunday School class, or asked to troubleshoot something.
I think I would write a chapter titled “Preparing Yourself for Those Who Are Never Prepared.” This chapter would teach a rookie tech that most people who require support for an event (musicians, speakers, pastors, event planners, etc.) will not be prepared. A very common issue lately for me has been when a speaker will be bringing their own laptop to run presentation slides, but they fail to realize that they will need a special adapter to convert to a VGA input. Other times musicians forget to bring instrument cables, their set of IEMs, or spare batteries. It helps to think through every situation that could possibly come up and try to be as prepared as possible before things start going wrong.
Good stuff – really enjoy the blog. Just an FYI, though, ‘bequeathed’ usually refers to something granted in a will after death. http://onelook.com/?w=bequeath
LOL. Whoops. Thanks for the catch.
Along the lines of the comment by bCaff, I had a guest missionary come in (back in August) not even 5 minutes before service and tell me that he had a PowerPoint with video he wanted to run. Somehow I was able to get everything set before service started. (Wasn’t the first time that had happened.)
After the service he left to catch a flight out, but forgot his flash drive. It’s still hanging on a hook in the pastor’s closet. He visits every year, so it’ll be there until August.
When I used to attend a smaller church, I always get pulled into doing something and people expect me to do everything. After a few years of moving to another church, I attended a wedding for a couple that we used to work with in the youth group. Well, I became the unofficial sound guy during the wedding ceremonies 5 minutes before the actual service started. It wasn’t easy but we managed :)
Being the sound guy is much akin to owning a pickup truck. Everyone wants to borrow you for something and no one wants to pay for it. ;)
Ha! You just described my Sunday Mornings!
My job description is “Youth Pastor”, but “Tech Dude” is what everyone calls me–for all the reasons you just wrote about.
Let me know when you write that book. I will spend top dollar for it!
And I like the website redesign! Looks great!
Thanks for the compliment on the site redesign. I loved the color scheme and the logo on the old one but I felt it was time for something new.